So there I was on the Old Tucson movie set of 'Rio Bravo,' one fine day, awed by the reality of an old western ghost town constructed in the hot Arizona desert and the fact that Hollywood movie legend John Wayne was sitting across the table from me in an honest to gosh real 'made in Hollywood' saloon.

Most of the sets along the dusty main street in the little western town were no more than fabricated 'storefronts,' built by film crews to resemble the real thing. Actors rode into town looking for some action, tied their horses' reins to the rail beside the wooden planked sidewalk and walked into the hotel for a good night's sleep, a hot bath and maybe a fling with a painted lady.

That was all make believe. Once inside the doors on main street, there was nothing for miles but Arizona desert dotted with an occasional cactus plant. The interior scenes were shot in Hollywood on conventional sound stages. But, the saloon in Old Tucson was the real thing. So real, in fact, it looked like a scene right out of an old John Ford western.

There was the conventional ornate bar with the mirrors on the wall and black and white photos of a naked woman who somewhat resembled Lilly Langtry, give or take a few pounds here and there.

A few bar patrons were telling funny stories and toasting beer bottles while a young cowboy - who turned out to be Ricky Nelson - sat on a beer keg nearby, strumming a guitar and singing a soulful ballad to a blonde beauty in a low-cut blouse.

The cast of 'Rio Bravo' was hanging out in the old saloon, killing time between takes and waiting for director Howard Hawks to summon them back into action outside before the cameras. Over in one corner sat John Wayne, with a bandana tied around his neck, critically looking at a chess set surrounded by a half dozen beer bottles.

He saw me come through the swinging bar doors and waved his arm for me to join him at his table. We exchanged greetings and handshakes. (Wayne squeezed my hand so hard, I could hardly hold a pencil with my fingers).

'You do know how to play chess, don'tcha boy?' quizzed big John, leaning back in his chair like he had just told a story about a long, hard cattle drive across the Red River.

I was too embarrassed to tell Wayne that I had never played chess before in my life, so I just sat there like a dumb klutz, shrugged my shoulders and replied 'Sorta, I guess.'

Somehow, I had visions of getting punched out by big John if I irritated him too much, so I just took a deep breath and played along with the ruse.

'The thing about chess,' John drawled, 'is that nobody in their right mind can play very good 'cause it takes half a damned day to study your moves and ponder the consequences. By then you're too damned tired. Kinda like sauntering up to Maureen O'Hara, looking into those sexy eyes of hers and wondering if you oughta make a move or not. You know what I mean?'

'You'd like to take your time and enjoy every blessed minute of it, but you know damn well you ain't gonna, so you make a quick move before you change your mind and it's too damn late.'

The Duke was in fine form. He picked up a bottle of scotch and poured himself a stout one, then motioned to the bartender to bring me a glass over to the table. When I told him I didn't drink, Wayne looked at me like I was a half-breed who had run off with the preacher's daughter.

'The hell you don't,' he said. 'Well, you do now. There ain't nothing any better in the world than a glass of scotch, less maybe it's kissing a beautiful woman or kicking some damn Commie's ass.'

The bartender brought me the glass and Wayne poured me a drink, I sat there dumbfounded, afraid to take a sip. Having been raised in the Baptist church, I had never been around very many people who 'indulged' in drinking hard liquor.

'Well, go on now, boy, drink her down,' Wayne bellowed at me, like he was saying a line of crusty dialogue right out of the 'Rio Bravo' script. 'It'll put hair on your chest.'

I took a deep breath and gulped down the booze, and shortly thereafter was excusing myself and running to the bathroom to throw up. When I came back to the table, embarrassed as hell, Wayne was laughing up a storm.

'Hell, boy, don't feel bad. I did the same thing once when I was your age. You'll get used to it as you get older. Then again, maybe you'd be better staying sober.'

That's when Dean Martin sauntered over to the table. 'Sober' he asked. 'Hell, Duke, you've never been sober in your life. How would you know what sober was?'

Wayne looked at Martin out of the corner of his eye and replied. 'You're one to talk. You ain't got but one friend in this whole world and his name is Jack Daniels.'

Martin took off his hat and threw it at Wayne, who dodged it and fell backwards in his chair. It was an awkward, but funny moment between two good friends.

'Now see whatcha done,' Wayne snapped at Martin as he tumbled to the floor. 'Damn drunk can't even throw a hat straight.' But Dino had his own response.

'You'd of caught that damn hat Duke if you'd been looking at it instead of checking out Angie Dickinson over by the bar,' he commented.

'You damned right I would,' drawled Wayne, as he picked himself up off the floor. Then he pointed to Angie at the bar. 'You ever seen a broad with better legs in you life?'

Martin was about to answer the question when Wayne continued. 'Hell, Dino, I've worked with half the best looking women in Hollywood. Shirley MacLaine, Ann-Margret, Betty Grable. There ain't nobody in Hollywood got better legs than Angie. Betcha a bottle of scotch.'

Martin laughed at his friend. 'I'll drink to that,' he said matter-of-factly, as he reached for the half empty bottle on the table.

'Now hold on there fella,' said big John. 'Next thing you know you'll have the boy there taking another drink and he ain't even had lunch yet. I got a better idea. Why don't you trot over there to the bar and sing Angie a little love song and invite her to join us over here at the table.'

Martin glanced at Wayne and took the bait. 'Think I will, Duke. But I ain't gonna bring her back over here unless you put away that chess set. Women don't like brainy dudes who sit around playing chess all day.'

When Dean got up from the table and started for the bar, Wayne hollered at him. 'Check your fly Dino, women don't like dudes who walk around in public with their fly open.'

Martin hitched up his pants and went over to the bar where Angie was having a conversation with Dave Nelson, Ricky's older brother.

Angie didn't see Dean sneaking up behind her back. Or, if she did, she didn't act like it. At the last minute, just as Dean was about to make his big sales pitch, she swirled around on the bar stool, exposing one of those gorgeous legs and Martin whistled.

'My, my, my,' I heard her say, clear across the room. 'For a minute there, handsome, I thought you were gonna ask me to dance.'

Martin was caught off guard, but he responded by bowing, courteously, taking off his hat, and going through the motions of 'true western gentlemanly behavior.'

Angie reached down and adjusted the garter just a bit on her left leg. 'Whatcha think, Dino?' she asked. 'On a scale of one to ten, can I qualify for the drill team or what?'

Martin put his hat on the bar and apologized for sneaking up on the actress. He told her John Wayne wanted her to join them at the table in the corner.

Angie smiled at Dean and told him if Wayne wanted her to come over and sit with the boys, he'd have to get his ass up out of his chair and come over and ask her himself.

Martin stood there with a funny look on his face, like an actor suddenly forgetting his line in a class B movie. Then Wayne bellowed across the room: 'Go on handsome, sing the lady a love song. I dare ya to sing her a little tune. You do know how to sing, don'tcha?'

Angie got a good laugh out of that one. Then she looked at Martin, reached over to get his hat and put it on her head, then hiked up her skirt a bit.
'Well,' she asked him, "You gonna sing me a little tune or not?"

'Suppose I do,' Dean remarked, 'Would that convince you to come over and sit down in my lap for a spell?'

'It might,' Angie joked, 'depending on what you had in your pocket.'

Dino couldn't resist the temptation any longer. He started singing 'That's Amore' accapella and everybody in the joint gave him a big round of applause when he finished.

Angie took off Dean's hat and walked around the bar from table to table asking for tips. When she had pranced around one side of the saloon to the other, she sauntered over to our table, with Martin grinning like a Cheshire cat.

'Well, did you get yourself a good enough look,?' Angie asked John. 'Did you like what you saw?'

Wayne stood up straight as a telephone pole and said, 'Madam, that was the gosh-darndish walk I ever seen in my life. Better'n even my ol' heffer cow once done.'

Everybody laughed. Angie pitched the hat full of money on the table and then motioned for the bartender to bring everybody a round of drinks. That's when Wayne spoke up in my behalf.

'Don't bring no beer for that young sissy fella over there,' he said. 'Bring him a glass of milk.'

Then he turned to Angie and said like a true gentleman. 'Madam, would you care for a game of chess?' She responded by sitting down in my lap and throwing her arms playfully around my neck.

'Hi there soldier boy,' she said, 'I just love young men in uniforms.' I thought Dean was gonna fall out of his chair.

Actually, I told her, I wasn't in the Army, I was in the Air Force. 'You mean one of those flyboys?' she asked.

Reluctantly, I told her I didn't fly airplanes like James Stewart and all the stars in the movies. I wrote for the base newspaper. I was there on the set to do an interview with John Wayne.

That's when she spotted my 'baby Brownie' flashbulb camera sitting on the table by my notebook. Giving me a little pat on the cheek, she reached over for the camera and proceeded to take snapshots of Martin, Wayne and Pedro Gonzales Gonzales, who had sauntered over from the bar with Dave and Ricky Nelson.

'Here,' she said, 'handing my camera to the Duke. 'Take a picture of me with this handsome Air Force fella. Let's give him something to remember about this day beside your ugly mug.'

Then, she got out of my lap and handed me the camera. 'Take a picture of me with John,' she suggested. 'It'll give him something to use in his next divorce case.'

Wayne howled in laughter and uttered a swear word or two. I took the photo. Then Angie put her foot on the chair I had been sitting in and adjusted the garter on her leg again. She gestured to me to take another photo. I did.

Wayne immediately started bitching about the glare from the flashbulb. 'Hell, boy,' he yelled, 'get rid of that damn camera. I can't see my hand in front of my face, much less Angie.' He reached over to grasp a nearby hand.

'Give me your hand, honey,' he said, 'I can't see. I need somethin' to hold on to.' Wayne stretched forth his big hand in anticipation.

'That ain't Angie,' Ricky Nelson piped up, 'That's Dino.'

'Can I have the next dance, big fella?' Martin kidded. The Duke swore again, jumped back like he had just touched a hot stove and yelled at the bartender for another drink.

Everybody in the joint had a big laugh. Except John Wayne, who uttered a few choice profanities enroute to the bar.

'What in tarnation is goin' on here?' asked Walter Brennan, coming into the saloon and poking fun at Duke and Dino. 'You two fellas oughta be in jail. I oughta lock you up. Right now. Just for being plain honory. Dad blame it, a fella can't even go outside for a little stroll and a breath of fresh air without somebody startin' some kind of zany commotion. It's a cryin' shame.'

'Shut up and get me another drink,' Wayne commanded. 'Pretty soon I've gotta get back to work.'

Well, that's show biz, baby.


WOW, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT
Celebrity Trivia

Bo Derek photographed Shania Twain for the back cover of her CD, The Woman In Me.

Barbara Walters claims she still sleeps in nightgowns she bought in the '60s.

Nancy Reagan rarely misses an episode of 'Friends.'

Shaquille O'Neal turned down a chance to be on the Wheaties box because he's a Frosted Flakes devotee.

Penelope Cruz once listed Marilyn Monroe and Shirley MacLaine as her celebrity crushes.

Courtney Cox Arquette's friends call her Cece.

Heather Locklear is, reportedly, so concerned about the energy crisis in California, she bought $800 worth of candles to light her house every night.

Jude Judy's TV jury complained about flea bites on their ankles so much, they had to have the courtroom fumigated.

Christina Auguilera's new fragrance and cosmetic line is called Fetish.

Jackie Chan's mother has never seen any of his films because she considers him 'too violent.'

Rosie O'Donnell frequently gives herself a giant 'perfume shower' to cope with the stink of some of her superstar guests.

Ellen Burstyn was set to quit show biz until the nude role in a sex-filled x-rated film (the 1970 flick 'Tropic of Cancer') got her back on track.

Julia Roberts owns seven dogs, all rescued from the pound.

Victoria's Secret model Ines Rivero's first husband refused to have sex with her.

Freddie Prinze Jr. has a picture of John Wayne above his bed.

Jerry Seinfeld collects postage stamps that feature comedians, including Abbott and Costello and Laurel and Hardy.

Best-selling Danielle Steel writes all her books on a 1946 portable typewriter.

Singer Sinead O'Connor sez she had her first lesbian sex experience when she was a kid.

Sean 'P. Diddy' Combs has a butler named Fonsworth.

Jason Priestley owns more than 2,000 vintage ties.

Kirsten Dunst sees an astrologer twice a week for advice on her movie career.

Leelee Sobieski collects locks of hair from all her co-stars, including David Arquette and Drew Barrymore from 'Never Been Kissed.'

Michael Douglas' last divorce cost him in the neighborhood of $50-million.

'Matrix' star Keanu Reeves is a crossword puzzle fanatic. He's said to complete at least three 'super-difficult' puzzlers every day.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was 13 when he first started bodybuilding.

Rodney Dangerfield has made more than 70 appearances on 'The Tonight Show.'

In 1998, Farrah Fawcett 'loaned' her voice to the children's feature, 'The Brave Little Toaster Goes to Mars' � as an animated faucet.

Kathy Ireland delivered newspapers as a kid. She was named 'Paper Carrier of the Year' three years in a row.

Kelsey Grammer and David Hyde Pierce have two warthogs named after them at the Baltimore zoo.

Female impersonator RuPaul has an impersonator of her own, a dead ringer in drag.

Evel Knievel's dog is named Rocket.

CELEBRITY RAPS AND RAVES

I recently read a controversial article quoting some of today's top Hollywood celebrities saying they didn't believe in God. To mention a few:
George Clooney, reportedly, said he didn't believe in Heaven and Hell and he didn't know if he believed in God.

Christopher Reeve commented: 'Even though I don't believe in the Lord, personally, I try to behave as though He was watching.'
George Carlin stated: 'There is no Humpty Dumpty and there is no God.'
Amanda Donahoe claimed she was an atheist because she couldn't embrace a male God 'who has persecuted female sexuality throughout the ages.'
Katherine Hepburn and Margot Kidder also said they were atheists. Jack Nicholson commented that he didn't believe in God, and admitted he envied anyone who did, because it would certainly be 'a soothing experience.'
Jodie Foster nixed God because she said there is no evidence. She also sez she has never believed in God nor practiced any religion.

Angelina Jolie sez there doesn't need to be a God for her. She claims to find her own spirituality in people.

And, Marlon Brando even refused to swear to God in a courtroom because he claimed that he didn't believe in 'a conventional God.'
Normally, I wouldn't comment on such a personal issue, (and I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion), but since it has been raised rather dramatically, by a number of 'name' celebrities, here's my take on the situation.

I believe in God, though, I must admit, there are many things that test my faith on a daily basis. But, I don't believe I would be writing this column or have this website, if the Lord had not given me the talent and made it possible for me to do so. And, if I am successful, in some degree, the praise should not be given to me, but directed to God. I'm just thankful He gave me my talent and made it possible for me to be a small part of His plan.

I don't think Marlon Brando became a popular 'method actor' simply because he studied at Actors Studio or decided to get high on drugs.
I don't think Jodie Foster won an Oscar because some lesbian rights leader willed it to happen because it would be 'good for women.' I don't believe Katherine Hepburn became a great actress because she was born under a certain astrological sign, no more than I think Jack Nicholson became one of America's best actors because he's rich and loves the Lakers.

These people have all earned their popularity with devoted movie fans because of their skills and personalities. But, they didn't earn whatever level of greatness they achieved, simply because they were good looking or role models, or because they had sex with 'the in crowd.'

As far as I'm concerned, their talent was not 'bought' at an acting school or earned from the school of hard knocks. Their unique talent was God-given. They were each blessed with their talent by God; they didn't inherit it because they moved to California and studied Scientology or became intimate with the Beatles' guru or became a vegetarian or joined a gay rights movement or became a an evangelical religious fanatic like Dyan Cannon.

I certainly don't pretend to be a 'holier-than-thou' type person. But I do believe that the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. And that, I think, is a lot more important than what you may read into your astrological chart or whose ass you think you have to kiss to win an Oscar.

CELEBRITY MAIL BAG

Q. Is it true that some stars believe they lived in another lifetime? - M.A.R. Kansas City, Kansas
A. There are any number of stars who do believe they lived in another lifetime. Not only that, they also can tell you who they were and what they did. For instance, Ernest Borgnine believes he was a centurian in the Roman legions. Sean Connery sez he was an alcoholic railroad builder in Africa who lived with two native women � both of whom bore him sons and who died of alcohol poisoning. Lola Folana thinks she was a man married to a beautiful but evil woman who murdered the couple's little girl. Stephanie Powers was King Tut's wife, Ankhesenanmun. Then, of course, there's Shirley MacLaine, who claims to have been a Mongolian nomad, a poverty-stricken wretch in the streets of India, a Parisian dance hall girl, a prostitute, an actor-oracle in ancient Greece, and a court jestor for Louis XV.

Q. Is it true that the late actor John Wayne wore a toupee? - B.G. Tucson, Arizona
A. Yes, and so did a lot of other prominent stars, like Steve Allen, Fred Astaire, Jack Benny, George Burns and Humphrey Bogart. Current celebrities like Burt Reynolds, Sean Connery and Paul Simon also wear toupees.

Q. Did Dolly Parton get a 'boob job,' or is the star simply 'amply endowed?' - L.B. Sweetwater, Tx.
A. Yes, she had breast implants, though she was 'amply endowed' to begin with. At one stage in her career, reportedly, she had a breast reduction operation, as did Pam Anderson.

Q. Before she became a big star, I understand that Sharron Stone was a waitress at Denny's. Is that true? - P.A. Okla. City. Okla.
A. False. When she was first breaking into the business, Sharron briefly worked the counters at McDonald's.

Q. How did Sigourney Weaver get her show biz name? - M.R. Carlsbad, N.M.
A. The actress was born Susan Weaver. The name Sigourney came from a character in 'the Great Gatsby.'

Q. I understand Kirstie Alley was a cocainne addict. Right or wrong? - H.W. Tulsa, Okla.
A. Right. She once spent $400 a day on her habit.

CATCH A RISING STAR

If I had a dollar for every CD produced by a budding young superstar that comes in the mail, I could retire and take a vacation to Bermuda, or some other exotic locale. Usually, I listen to a track or two, then pass them on to friends who can't afford the luxury of collecting CDs, or I toss them in the big CD trash can in the corner of my office.

The other day I made an exception, when Vann Johnson's CD 'Messages' ended up in my mailbox. I knew who she was, because I have the DVD from Yanni's tour to the Forbidden City and she was quite impressive as his featured vocalist. Yes, she's sexy. Yes, she knows how to work a crowd. But what made a difference to me was that she's a talented singer. In the past, she's been knocked by critics who have compared her to Diana Ross or Donna Summer. They said she needed to 'quit trying to sound like other singers' and work on establishing her own style. I think she has found her identity.

Her 'Messages' album has a powerul message, but you will have to do more than sing along with the lyrics to get it. Just close your eyes and listen and let the music move you. The music is solid stuff, and Vann sings with soulful authority. I particularly liked her voice when she sang in the lower register. A Contemporary Christian label would do well to receive her vocal message loud and clear. (Are you listening Michael W. Smith')

CELEBRITY SHOPPING

A number of folks who find their way to Don Aly's Celebrity Scene are fascinated by all the celebrity memorabilia offered for sale, particularly the Marilyn Monroe and Elvis Presley items.

The Marilyn Monroe dolls produced at the Franklin Mint are all endorsed by the Marilyn Monroe Foundation and the film companies who produced movies in which Marilyn starred. The Elvis Presley memorabilia is endorsed by Graceland.

Of all the Marilyn Monroe dolls, the two most popular are probably the famous one with her white skirt blowing up in 'Gentlemen Prefer Blondes' and the one titled simply 'Love Marilyn,' inspired by the famous Milton Greene photograph. But then, every Marilyn Monroe doll offered by the Franklin Mint is spectacular and priceless.

Friends who tour the Marilyn Monroe Museum at the Donnyfun House are always impressed with the 'River of No Return' Marilyn Doll, the 'All About Eve' Marilyn Doll and the 'Some Like It Hot' Marilyn Doll. Not to mention the replica doll of Marilyn entertaining the troups.

Most of the dolls are porcelain. All come with authentic accessories. The 'Some Like It Hot' Marilyn Doll even has a small silver flask, for instance, engraved with Marilyn's initials, M.M.

The Franklin Mint also sells John Wayne Dolls, (endorsed by the John Wayne Foundation), including one with a John Wayne voice track. And, you can also purchase 'Gone With the Wind' Dolls and 'Titantic' Dolls from the Franklin Mint, as well as other celebrity dolls - such as Bob Hope, Bing Crosby, Elizabeth Taylor and Lucille Ball.

The Franklin Mint also features the Vivian Leigh 'Gone With The Wind' Doll, which I think is stunning. It's probably the most talked about doll in the Donnyfun House collection.

Marilyn Monroe and Elvis Collector Plates are also showcased on Don Aly's Celebrity Scene website. They're produced by the Bradford Exchange and offer a variety of selections.

One reason fans and collectors like the plates are because they're autographed by the stars. Some of the Elvis plates resemble recording discs, and that seems to be popular with collectors as well.

One of the more popular celebrity items featured on the Don Aly celebrity Scene website is the authentic model of the pink Cadillac Elvis gave his mother. The model's steering wheel turns, the wheels move and the hood and trunk open and close, as do the doors. The memorable Elvis Cadillac is available through the Franklin Mint.

Music fans also have been going crazy over the Britney Spears posters offered through Art.com. There are several Britney posters available. You just have to look through the on-line catalog and take your pick.

If you're confused about where to find, and how to order the Marilyn and/or Elvis memorabilia, the John Wayne memorabilia or other celebrity type memorabilia, simply click on the Celebrity Dolls button on the left side of Don Aly's Home page. Or, you can click on Collectors Items. Or, you can select the photos of Elvis and the pink Cadillac.

It's easy to order celebrity memorabilia at the Don Aly Celebrity Scene website, if you use your credit card. When you make your shopping cart choices, the information is self explanatory. Have fun and happy celebrity shopping.

SHOW BIZ PROMO PACKAGE

So many folks who have visited the Don Aly Celebrity Scene website have asked us to identify the stars featured in the Gone With The Stars Art.com poster featured on Don Aly's home page, we decided to sponsor a contest to name all the stars. It's simple to participate. Simply sign up to receive the Don Aly Celebrity Scene weekly email (free) and send your star identification selections to DonnyFun@DonAly.com. The first person to correctly select all of the stars showcased in the poster on the home page (also pictured below) will receive a free copy of this Celebrity Collector's Gone With The Stars picture.

CELEBRITY FOOTNOTE

Leave it to Angie Dickinson to have the last word: 'I dress for women and undress for men.'